One night, I came home after working a closing shift, walked into my bathroom, and when I turned on the light I noticed that something wasn’t quite right. Rather, there was a new addition to my little bathroom. Sitting on the wall, at about eye level, was a GIANT wolf spider. For those of you who are unfamiliar, wolf spiders are a common sight across North America and some of them can grow quite large and hairy (hence the name wolf). This was one such spider…here…for your viewing pleasure!
I stared at my new roommate and thought, Well…good evening. It’s nice to meet you but you simply cannot stay. My sincerest apologies. Now, most people probably would have grabbed a magazine, shoe, or some other close at hand object to promptly (and messily) deal with the intruder but, truthfully, I don’t like killing things. So, I grabbed a glass, sheet of paper, and carefully captured the eight-legged trespasser. I released her outside of my window and then called it a night. Mission accomplished! I fell asleep peacefully with the knowledge that my apartment was pest free!
The next night I came home again after closing, walked into my bathroom, turned on the light and…SON OF A BITCH! There she is again, right on my wall! YES, IT WAS THE SAME SPIDER! Rather annoyed, yet, somewhat impressed by the spider’s tenacity and affinity to my bathroom, I recaptured her but this time, instead of putting her out the window I decided to be more of a gentleman and walk her out the front door and small distance down the sidewalk. I then went through my nightly routine and climbed into bed. As I fell asleep, the sneaking suspicion fell upon me that I had not seen the last of the Itsy Bitsy Spider.
On the third night, I came home and guess who was waiting for me!? You got it! There was Shelob again, only this time she was sitting in the most inaccessible corner of the bathroom, perhaps in an effort to maintain residence in her newfound real estate and evade capture. I stared blankly at her. She stared right back. A few minutes went by. Finally, I had to concede that I had met my match and some sort of negotiation was in order.
Ok, Spider…I shall provide you with lodging and hunting ground and not interfere with your business as long as you do not crawl on me, bite me, or lay eggs in my ear. Agreed?
She did’t stir.
Wonderful, I shall take your silence as agreement. Goodnight.
I went to bed, uncertain of whether or not the new resident would respect our treaty but knowing that, next to turning her into a pancake, I had done all I could. I never saw the spider again.